Surprising my husband.

My test of choice came as a three pack. I might as well just go ahead and use that last test, right? First thing this morning I get to experience that excitement all over again. I wait the full three minutes of my test being flipped over to reveal that little present that is a pink line. This is real. It’s real!

Matthew’s coming home tonight so I start thinking about creative ways to tell him. We don’t settle on the house until tomorrow so I know we’ll be at Mom and Dad’s house. I don’t want them to know yet so it should be subtle. That’s when I decide this will be my little gift to him. The surprise. I give him little gifts often enough that this wouldn’t seem weird or suspicious.

At work I set about finding the perfect small box to wrap my present, a single sheet of paper simply stating, “I’m pregnant!” It’s easy to dismiss questions as to why I need a particular box seeing as we’re in the process of moving.

On the way to Mom and Dad’s house, I stop at the drugstore to pick up my first bottle of prenatal vitamins. I have to skillfully dodge a coworker that I’ve just realized is also in the pharmacy. No one gets to know before I tell my husband so best to just pretend I don’t know he’s there and keep to myself. Nothing wrong with that.

I get home, wrap up my gift, and set it on the desk where I know Matt will probably head first. It looks as impatient as I feel with its bright wrapping tissue, begging to be noticed. I keep myself busy by heading over to our soon to be new home and work on the master bedroom.

Matt eventually arrives at the house to see the progress that’s been made. I can tell that he’s worn down from the business trip but I try to stay upbeat. He doesn’t want to go home right away. He’s on the hunt for Chip’s Ahoy. I direct him to the nearest convenience store, noticeably anxious to get home.

Once home I dash up the stairs and grab the wrapped box and thrust it into his hands beckoning him to open it quickly. He gives it a little shake and I can tell he’s got no clue as to what’s really inside. Then the questions start. “Did I miss a gift-giving occasion?”
“It’s not our anniversary…”
After some trouble with the tape I used to secure the box, he rips through and tears out the tissue paper looking for the surprise inside. It’s only then that he realizes that it may not be as big as he had thought it would be and started picking things apart a bit more carefully. The piece of paper falls out into his hand and he looks at it but continues looking in the box. Perplexed, he realizes the gift is the paper.  He has to turn it around to see the carefully scrawled message. His lips move to mouth what it says and after a brief second of letting it sink in, the look comes.

The sheer excitement that says, “Oh my God. OH MY GOD!”

Matthew looks at me and I mouth the words to him and begin to tear up. He cradles me against him and I can feel him shake. It’s excitement I think. After all, that is a lot of information for anyone to absorb all at once. Not to mention we’re trying to be quiet so my parents don’t hear us. We don’t give away too much.

The rest of the night is spent passing knowing glances and with me relaxing with my head on his lap while he strokes my hair. It’s perfect.

I'm Pregnant!

Today I found out that I’m pregnant. Matthew and I decided to quit using birth control a little while back so I’ve been off the pill since June 15^th. Realistically we figured it would take us a while to get pregnant but we were at a point in our lives where we were ready when it happened.

I only took the test because I missed my period. Something I kind of expected might happen as a result of coming off of the pill. I was at the dentist and they asked me if I might be pregnant and I said no but the more I thought about it, the more pregnancy seemed like a possibility.
I skipped a little time out of work to run home and take the test in the middle of the day when no one would be home. If I became emotional over the result, one way or the other, I didn’t want anyone to see.

I had been avoiding peeing all morning so that I could make sure I could take the test. I went in the bathroom, took the test, and set it aside knowing that you’re supposed to wait three minutes to read the result. Any time I take a pregnancy test I also turn it face down so I’m not tempted to peek and ruin the potential surprise (or in college, the potential panic). After a few minutes of distracting myself on my iPod, it was time to turn it over.

There it was. Faint, but unmistakably there. Oh my God. Really? Take another one! Wait; I don’t have to pee anymore. It’ll have to wait.

I headed back to work in a bit of a daze and wonder at what I’ve just seen. I think skepticism was the overriding feeling at the moment.

That afternoon I decided to take another test to try and quiet the little voice in my head telling me that it’s not real. That is was just a false positive. Again, that faint little line is there declaring that the signal may not be strong yet, but it is most definitely there.

That night I can’t sleep. Matthew is out of town on business and won’t be home until tomorrow but I am bursting with information now. I need to talk but I’m not going to pass this news over the phone. I want to see his face. So instead I suffer through hours of tossing, turning, and over-thinking.

It’s at least 2:30 AM before I drift off to sleep.